That Special Person

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Sometimes there are people in our lives that change everything. They are a constant force of strength, of love, of inspiration. Simply having them in your life has made it that much richer, that much more invigorating. I am lucky enough to have many people like that, but out of them all there is one that is special to everyone,  my Nannie. She is sweet, fiery, sharp, and boy if you cross her you better run. (Seriously, run really really fast!)

My Nannie is one the greatest woman I know. She is someone I admire, someone I want to keep with me always. I know each and every person in my family feels the same. I mean look at that face, how could you not love that woman?

Nannie

The Coolest Woman Ever Invented

My mother calls her mom, I call her Nannie, and my daughters call her Nana, she is a woman with many names. Being the Matriarch of a four generation family can’t be easy, especially since we keep popping out more girls. Luckily, she is a force to be reckoned with so she keeps us in line pretty well. Without her threatening to put me through a wall every now and then, I am sure I would not be where I am today.

So this holiday season, try to remember that the only reason you are as awesome as you are is because you had great people shaping you. And if you are not awesome, well, come meet my Nannie. She will whip you into shape in no time!

I wish the happiest of birthdays to my Nannie, who is celebrating her 85th birthday. Everything I wrote here is still true today!

Is It Seriously Winter Already?

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I know. Before you say it, I know I had wished for Fall to come just a few months ago. The thing is, I wished for FALL. Not Winter. I dislike Winter for the most part. Yes I love the holiday season, and the happy, joyful feel, but lets face it, that ends after New Years. The worst part of winter is easily commuting in the Winter. So far we have had a few little scattered flurries, but it was enough to make each highway I have to drive on a freaking parking lot. I can only imagine my commute time when the snow actually sticks to the ground. I am not looking forward to it. I have to be at work by 9, therefore I will need to leave my house at… 6 am. Oh and getting home for dinner? Sure. If I left at 3. But no. I leave at 6. Are you seeing the awesomeness yet?

Snow Traffic

Oh sweet traffic. How I despise you.

It’s not just snow I have to worry about. There are two things worse than snow. Black ice- it’s a serious bitch- and other drivers. That’s right. If someone even thinks they see snow, they immediately turn into moron. OMG It’s a snowflake! MUST STOMP ON BRAKE AND CAUSE MULTI-CAR ACCIDENT! This may not be the exact thought process, but it might as well be. Come on people. We are New Englanders. Snow is a part of life. Get over it.

It’s amusing because in January, everyone is all ahhh! Snow! then all of a sudden March hits, and we have had snow storm after snow storm and suddenly we are all we are only getting 14 inches? What a joke. That’s not a snow storm! I could drive my Prius to work in that! (If you own a Prius, stop reading my blog. Hate those cars…) However, they still suck because they don’t know how to drive in snow.

Anyone else find this bi-polarness annoying? It makes traffic that much more irritating. How? Because this is how it goes…

Driver sees snow. Driver immediately turns into idiot and doubts his ability to drive in snow. Driver causes accident. Everyone else thinks Oh no! It must be bad out, he got into an accident! Everyone else turns into an idiot and forgets how to drive in snow. They slow down. Traffic backs up. I turn into a raging monster. I run late for work. I run late getting home. The world suddenly sucks.

OR

Driver sees snow. Thinks this isn’t snow! Driver immediately turns into idiot and overestimates his awesomeness. Begins speeding. Driver causes accident. Everyone else thinks He must be new here, look at him! Can’t even drive in a little snow! They immediately speed up and overestimate their awesomeness. They get in accidents. Traffic backs up. I turn into a raging monster. I run late for work. I run late getting home. The world still sucks.

It’s a lose lose situation. A bit dramatic? NOT AT ALL. (Okay maybe a little…)

Ice Storm

Seriously… Do you just say eff it and hibernate until spring when this happens?

Alright I am done with my rant, sort of. And no, it is not snowing. My car door was frozen shut this morning. I literally stood there yanking at my door trying to open it. When I finally did, the rubber part surrounding my door came off and I had to put it back. Then my windows were frozen shut and I couldn’t roll down my window to order my coffee. I actually had to get out of my car and go into Starbucks. I parked and opened my door and stepped right into a nice freezing puddle. All of this only served to infuriate me as it means winter really is coming. (cue GOT reference go go!)

I think I may hibernate this winter. And by hibernate I mean build a fort in my living room and refuse to come out until winter is over.

Pride: A Thought on Little Doherty Girls

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Doherty Girls

Five Little Doherty Girls

The five little Doherty girls are as charming as can be

you don’t have to be their mommy to see.

Though from one family they came,

none are really quite the same.

Some are adorably tall

and others so perfectly small.

One is trickier than a fox,

and another is stronger than an ox.

One is quite sweet and another fairly witty.

The youngest, well she is just so itty bitty.

Though they are still very young

Its best not to cross them so bite your tongue

lest your mean words cause them harm.

For these little girls have just as much bite as they do charm.

Oh, Good Morning Monday

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It is Monday, our favorite day of the week. I am starting to think that Monday isn’t just a day, but an actual entity. And it hates me. With a burning passion. My day started like this;

Woke up to baby crying. Hubby decides that he can ignore the baby, even though its his turn to get up. He doesn’t. So I do. It is 4 AM. I get baby to fall back asleep, for an hour. She is up again. This time I elbow the hubby and he reluctantly gets up, re-wraps her and plops her beloved pacifier back in. She is content, but awake. He goes back to bed. He starts snoring. She is munching happily on her little orange pacie. Mommy lays awake until she begrudgingly gets up to start her day.

Cue traffic. Lots of it. 495 is backed up. So I go Route 2 to 95. That‘s a mess. An hour and a half later I arrive at work and stop to grab a coffee. Dunkin Donuts made my coffee wrong. Not just a little wrong, but wicked wrong. Like asking for a French Vanilla with skim milk and no sugar, and getting a pumpkin coffee with EXTRA FREAKING CREAM and like 12 sugars. I gagged. I went back in and had them make me a new one, something I never do. Next go? Regular coffee. Begrudgingly, I accept it. I head in to work. Someone bumps into me while walking into my office, and my hot coffee spills down my shirt. Fantastic. A couple of paper towels later, I look somewhat normal. I head into my office and throw on the light. And guess what? There is a massive freaking spider chilling on the window. And because its on the outside, I can’t get it to move. Its just sitting there, looking at me. I know its looking at me. Now its eating a bug. Great.

Its not even 11, and all I want to do is pretend this day never existed. Seriously. Mondays are like Karma days. I cut someone off on Friday, now Monday is all I’m Gonna Get You My Pretty! Screw this. I want my bed.

Sincerely,

A wicked annoyed, coffee-drenched woman who can’t help but stare at the massive spider on her window.

Gumption: A Thought About Pursuing Dreams

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I am proud to say that I am from a family that has a lot of gumption. We grab life by the balls and make it our bitch. Forgive my brutal honesty, but it is true. There is not a single person in my family who doesn’t rock. On my mother’s side at least. My dad’s side, that’s a whole different story. But screw them we aren’t talking about them.

Point being, I have some great examples to aspire to in my family. This is part of where my determination stems from. It is due to their support that I have come as far as I have. And trust me, it wasn’t easy. I work full time, commute as much as as three hours a day, raise two children, a crazy pooch, and a husband. (Yes, I sometimes feel like I am raising my husband!) I go to school online full time, and maintain two blogs, and I edit on the side. Why do I put myself through this? Because I am determined to get to where I want to be.

I want to write. I want to read. I want to edit. I want that to be my job. I want to be so immersed into the literary world that I can duplicate the library in Beauty and the Beast. Okay that is a bit of an exaggeration, but still. If I had the space I probably would make that my goal.

And you know what? I will achieve that, no matter how hard I have to work. Because that is what my family taught me. Because I have the gumption to make it happen. Do you?

Mommy, I want to be a Mermaid.

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Mermaid Mother and Child by Shijun Munns

Mermaid Mother and Child by Shijun Munns

This little declaration from my open minded three year old was made last night, shortly after my copy of The Little Mermaid arrived in the mail. We were sitting on the couch, preparing for bed when she smiled up at me, her big brown eyes wide with joy.

“Mommy, I’m going to be a Mermaid when I get bigger.” She said it with such reverence, such confidence, such elation and I could not help but feel so proud of her.

Younger and younger, children’s imaginations are being stripped from them in an attempt to educate them on the real world. The magic of being young is losing the war against our perceived reality. In fact, I recently read an article where the writer actually encouraged parents to dissuade their child from creating unobtainable goals, such as being a mermaid, because it sets them up for failure which leads to decreased self esteem.

Well you can dissuade your child, Mrs. Big Shot Parenting Writer, but I will not. My daughter will grow up to be a mermaid, do you know why? Because when I am swimming, I AM a mermaid. When I am in the shower singing horribly off tune, I am doing it to an audience of millions. When I walk down the street, you bet your pretty little behind that flash mobs are dancing around me like they do in Disney movies. Why? Because unlike you, I don’t believe reality is confined to what we see. Reality is what we make of it, and is unique to us all. Where you look at a child flopping chaotically in the pool, I see a mermaid splashing about with her very own purple, sparkly tale.

And there is nothing you can do about it.

Types of Writers

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Kay's Novel Nook

Over the passed week, I have had the honor of reading a few manuscripts not yet published. As I read them, I began to think about what drives writers to write. Where do their stories come from? The obvious answer would be from the mind, or heart, of the writer. Is that always the case though? Of course the book, in the form it is in, came from the mind of the writer, but was it always there? This leads me to my topic, the different types of writers.

This post has nothing to do with genres, writing styles, or even whether or not you are professional. It has to two with two things, and two things only. The ones who write to write, and the ones who write to win. Now that may seem like a bit of an odd way to phrase things, but please allow me to…

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Finding Your Voice

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findyourvoice

Yesterday, I was speaking with a pretty fabulous friend of mine and she said something that sparked a bit of a soul-searching-vibe within me. She told me to keep writing, and eventually I would find my voice. Of course, my initial thoughts on this were along the lines of a typical child; “But when would I find it? How will I know I found it? Why do I need a stupid voice anyways?” Okay, that last one was just something a petulant child (me) would have said before she matured to the awesome person she is today. (Everyone that knows me just snorted at that statement.) The real question is, what is my voice? What is it that I hope to accomplish with this blog? Or with my writing in general?

The truth is, I have no idea. I know that I love to write, and this blog lets me do that. It also lets people read my writing. A goal of any writer is reach an audience, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Yeah I know, a lot of writers say “I write for myself” but that’s just not true. If it were just for yourself, then you could keep it locked up in that pretty little brain of yours and just dream it like a movie. But when you put that pen to the paper, you are doing so to share. And that’s a beautiful gift, one that people should cherish.

So what beautiful gift do I want to share? I am not sure yet. Do I want to become a published author? Of course I do. Do I have what it takes? No idea. Will I try? Probably, at some point. However, I don’t think that is all that I am meant to do. Thanks to this blog, I was able to meet some wonderful people, and these people value my opinion. It has allowed me to realize that maybe writing isn’t all I am good at. Being able to help other writers, even with just a few corrections here and there, or some advice on story flow, has become a passion I never knew existed. Who knows, maybe one day this blog will say “Kay Froebel, Editor.” That sounds like a good voice to me.

Am I a selfish mom?

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I am proud to be a working mom, I will start with that. I am proud that I can help provide for my family and work towards giving them a better future. But I will not lie, sometimes it sucks. Its not just the time away from my kids that gets to me, but also the feelings of my children. Do you have any idea how much it annoys me that I am not my eldest daughter’s favorite? I feel like mom should always be top rung. I mean come on, I only have a few happy years with her before she morphs into a teenager and suddenly I am the enemy, right?

While my daughter is a huge daddy’s girl, he is also not the center of her world. It is Nannie, her grandmother, and my mother, that she idolizes most. I actually do love the relationship between them, and I am thrilled that my daughter has this love for my mother, but boy do I get insanely jealous. I know I know… nobody tops grandma because they get to spoil them rotten. Still, it drives me nuts.  There is a proverb that fits this pretty well. “What the daughter does, the mother did.” I am pretty fond of my Nannie too, so I guess I should have seen this coming.

No matter how I rationalize it, it still makes me jealous! At the same time, I am not about to spoil her to get some love. I mean it makes sense for her to prefer her Nannie, because Nannie gives her cookies and lollipops (as she should), and then mommy makes her wait until after dinner to eat them. To a three year old, this is the most horrible punishment in existence. Believe me, the meltdowns I have witnessed over this very scenario should be videotaped. Maybe next time I will…

Kayla and her Nannie, picking blueberries!

Kayla and her Nannie, picking blueberries!

And I know what your going to say, that deep down mommy is always number one. Be that as it may, it doesn’t usually feel like it.

With my newest daughter, however, I am her favorite. This makes me want to dance, and do a very immature “Na na na na nah!” towards my mother while sticking out my tongue. Hey… I don’t actually do it! It just flashes up in my mind every now and then. Still, I view it as a mini victory as a working mom. Since I work long hours all week, my husband is with our children during the day as he works weekends. He gets to spend a the majority of his time with them. Despite that, I am still the one Maddy smiles at most, the one she coos at, and the one that she is most happy with. She will let other people hold her… for a while. Then she cries and wants mommy again. Even Nannie and Daddy. Ah, the feeling of joy that washes over me is spectacular.

Do you, working moms, worry about your children’s feelings? Do you, stay at home moms, experience this too?

And lastly, am I selfish to want my children to like me best? (The answer to that is probably yes, but oh well I am selfish then!)

An Intro and an Update

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I know, it’s been a heck of a long time, huh? Glad to know that I was missed, and thank you to everyone for all the where-the-hell-are-you emails, I was touched that you guys missed me so much. I know it has been a long time, and I am sorry about that. You would think on bedrest I would have had quite a lot of time on my hands to write, read, review, and just be around. Sorry, it wasn’t that kind of bedrest. It was the I-can’t-move-or-I-may-vomit kind. Yeah, pregnancy and me, we aren’t so cool. In fact, if pregnancy were a person, she and I would be mortal enemies. If I had been writing, it would have been 9 months of moaning and groaning about how much I hated being pregnant, so I figured it was probably best to stay away from the blogging bit for a while.

Now I am back. I will first start by introducing you to my newest little addition.

Madison Marie <3

Madison Marie ❤

Do you see that face? Seriously. It’s a shame this baby factory is closed because I make some cute babies. This is Madison. Maddy was born on June 26th, weighing a whopping 8lbs 2oz. Not bad considering I spent the majority of the pregnancy not eating and getting my fluids through a tube in my arm. She came like a bat out of hell, and I am quite astonished that I was only pushing for 4 minutes. Yeah, did you read that? 4 minutes. Go me.

As you can imagine, adjusting to life with an infant, while recovering from HG (Hyperemesis Gravidarum), has not been easy. At the same time, it is a lot easier than I imagined. Seriously, she may have kicked my butt for nine months, but once she was out, she’s like the best baby ever invented. Sleeps through the night, doesn’t cry much, and is just a totally happy pleasant baby. I am quite thankful.

Now, onto business! This site is changing. Now that I am back to being me, for the most part, I have decided to kick things up a notch on this website. It will be splitting. Kay Froebel will still be here as my primary blog, where you can find info on parenting, life, and anything I deem to write about. It will be my foundation, if you will, my platform. Anything related to books has found a new home on Kay’s Novel Nook, where all of my reviews, interviews, short stories, or other “bookwormy” things will be showcased. Please note: Both sites will be getting a makeover so please bear with me during the updates.

Starting October 1st, you can expect to see a slew of new posts going up as I reintroduce myself to the blogging world.

Hope you enjoy!

Love,

Kay